3AM at the Oasis; Killing Me Softly With His Corn

Killing me softly with his corn.

"  ?"

"Yes my new chaver, Chaim Ben Shlomo, the world that HaShem created in six days is full of wonders, yet full of twists and turns. Sublime. That little creature, the mouse, might one day save my life. How? I have no clue, but The Almighty has a penchant for endorsing the unlikely. The brightest star is not necessarily the chosen..."

How to delicately get him to stop? Nice and as kind as they come, but insufferable. An image of Edvard Munch's painting, The Scream, flashed before Harry.

"...Was Jacob's star son, Joseph, the progenitor of the tribe that produced kings? No, my friend, this was not the case. The kingly tribe where ultimately the Messiah shall emerge is Judah, who was but a middle son, not the b'chor, the eldest like Reuven, or..."

The Scream, The Scream.

"Aaaaaaaahhhhh..." Harry screamed. He couldn't keep it in anymore. He burned with shame from the outburst and instinctively pointed to the corner of the office.

"The mouse," he mumbled.

Rabbi Moish chuckled, "Yes, I understand. We all have our own irrational fears. Yours may be mice, mine, like most chassids are dogs. Perhaps a cold refreshing glass of lime-flavored seltzer water will calm frayed nerves?" Rabbi Moish reached into the mini fridge, pulled out a half-full bottle of New York lime-flavored seltzer water and poured some into a coffee mug (after he emptied it's contains of chewed-up Bic pens).

"Aaaaaahhhhhh...." Harry cried.

"Why don't you just drink out of the bottle, Chaim? Coffee mugs can be rather intimidating reminding one of all the stresses of business..."

Harry grabbed the bottle of seltzer and chugged until it was empty. Cool relief.

"Rabbi, can I just use the phone now?"

"Of course, please proceed. It has occurred that you have been stalling. It is best to just grab the bull by the horns..."

Itzie stormed into the office. "Is everything okay? I heard a scream."

Rabbi Moish chuckled. "Everything is perfectly fine, Itzie, you alarmist. It seems that our friend, Chaim here was startled by a mouse."

Itzie chuckled. "Yes indeed. That reminds me of the story in the Talmud where--"

"--a young man needs to place an urgent phone call," Harry interrupted. Enough was enough.

Rabbi Moish chuckled. "I believe that it is now time for us to leave our dear friend, Chaim, alone to make his call."

The rabbis chuckled some more and left the office.